Madeline Buss, residing in Vancouver, recounts a poignant narrative in this First Person column. While finalizing the lease for her initial apartment thousands of kilometers away from her mother, she received distressing news that her mother had been transferred to the ICU. Struggling with feelings of guilt and inadequacy, Madeline reflects on the challenging health journey her mother has endured, including battles with multiple sclerosis, bone cancer, and mental health issues.
The pivotal moment arrived when Madeline received a call from her stepfather, revealing the daunting prospect of her mother needing a heart transplant. Despite the overwhelming news, Madeline proceeded with signing the lease papers, her mind consumed with worry and doubt. As she grappled with conflicting emotions, the weight of not being by her mother’s side during such a critical time weighed heavily on her.
Madeline’s transition to university in a different province was marked by inner turmoil as she balanced pursuing her aspirations with the responsibility of caregiving for her mother. Supported by her stepfather, who encouraged her to prioritize her own well-being, Madeline learned the importance of reciprocal care and support within relationships. While physical distance strained their interactions, Madeline and her mother found solace in adapting to their evolving dynamic through phone conversations.
Acknowledging the shifting roles within her family, Madeline witnessed her stepfather taking on more caregiving duties, allowing her to focus on her academic pursuits. Despite the challenges of being away from her mother during critical moments, Madeline gradually found peace in accepting her limitations and embracing the present. With each passing day, she navigates the delicate balance between observing life’s events and taking charge of her own path, finding solace in the journey of growth and resilience.


