Acclaimed Canadian writer Miriam Toews delves deeply into the personal tragedies of losing her father and sister to suicide in her latest book, “A Truce That Is Not Peace.” While her previous works approached these losses from various perspectives, this new book marks the first time she delves into her own experience of these events.
Toews reflects on the suicides of her father, Melvin Toews, a respected elementary school teacher in Steinbach, Man., who battled bipolar disorder and took his life in 1998. Subsequently, her older sister Marjorie also succumbed to suicide in 2010 after battling severe depression. In her book, Toews describes this as an internal confrontation, a process of trying to make peace with her loved ones’ decisions.
In “A Truce That Is Not Peace,” Toews narrates snippets of her daily life with honesty and vulnerability, reflecting on different stages of her existence, from childhood to parenthood and now grandparenthood. The narrative weaves through these life phases as she endeavors to reach a point of deep respect for her father and sister’s choices to end their lives.
Toews, known for her award-winning works such as “A Complicated Kindness” and “Women Talking,” was recently honored with the Order of Canada for her exceptional storytelling that captures human struggles and resilience.
The book also delves into Toews’ relationship with her father and sister through poignant memories. It portrays her admiration for her father’s reactions to her jokes and her deep awe for her sister’s grace and intelligence. These reminiscences form a significant part of the book as Toews grapples with her identity as a writer, a journey that has remained constant amidst life’s upheavals.
Despite facing dark times, including contemplating suicide herself, Toews finds solace in her family’s unity after her sister’s passing. She emphasizes the importance of family bonds and how they have sustained her through life’s trials. The book serves as a reflective exploration of her journey and a response to the fundamental question of why she writes, culminating in a realization that brings a sense of truce amid life’s uncertainties.
For those struggling with mental health issues or contemplating suicide, various resources are available for support, including helplines and crisis centers.
